Growing apart.

Have you ever felt like you are about to grow apart from someone that you love? Well, yes, time change, people change. But how would you feel if that someone who is the one that is very dear to you? It's hard to accept the fact that the one that you love is growing apart from you and the person is changing. Today, I want to blog about someone that always have a special place in my heart and I can feel like we're now growing apart. Quite far apart.

What really is the main thing that cause this thing? Was it the distance? I don't really think the distance. Maybe you've changed. And yeah, people change. I am trying my best to accept the fact that you've changed completely. You chose to be who you are today. I guess you are not matured enough for the time being. Maybe it takes time. But, how long will it take? I'm afraid if one day, you are too late to realize that what you've done for all these while are useless. I don't want you to ruin your life. I don't want you to regret with what you've done.

To be frank, I miss you. I miss the old you. I miss the time when we used to sit together wth the rest and talk about everything. You were so dear to me. I've known you for my whole life. I cried for you when you were being scolded by Abah when you were small. I miss 'bangcik yang anak Mama'. I don't like the new you. I know that people change. But why do you have to change to be someone like this? I miss 'bangcik yg naive'. Oh! How I miss the good old days. I wish you change to be someone better because I have faith in you that you will be someone better. I am not saying that you turn out to be a bad person, but you've change alot through these years. It's like you are no longer my bangcik. It's like I don't even know who you are anymore. But, no matter how, I hope one day you'll realize this. No matter how and no matter what, you are still my bangcik and I'll always pray for your succes. =). And yeah, I will still love you with all my heart. =)

I know that I should be doing some revisions right now. Sorry mama, jap lagi angah study eyh. I don't know why but I miss my brother so much. I miss the old him. But then I have to acept the fact that he is no longer the old bangcik.

My next paper is on Friday (Oct 31st). Please pray for me. =)

xoxo

-zafirahrosland-

=)

"Yesterday is a history,

Tomorrow is a mystery,

Today is a gift, a gift from God,

And that is why it is call 'present'."

Yes, today is a gift. We have to cherish everything that happen today. No matter what it is. We can remember that past but we can't live with the past. The past is a history to be remembered and not to live with. Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, but we have to concentrate our minds on the present moment. What ever that had happened in my past, I will still keep them as memories no matter how sweet they were and no matter how bad they were. And one day, I am sure when I look back to the past, I will smile because I know that what happened in the past and what is happening right now, are the things that make me what I am today. But, eventhough I want to move forward in my life, I may still have one foot on the brakes. In order to be free, I have learn how to let go. I have to release the hurt, release the fear and refuse to entertain my old pain. I am trying my best not to live with the past. I have moved on with my life. Thanks to the people that never gave up on me eventhough sometimes I gave up on myself. Thanks to those who believe in me. Thanks to the people who is always there for me. Thanks for the advices. Thanks to those who had hurt me. Thanks for giving me the pain. The pain thought me how to be stronger. Thanks. To this one particular person, *thenameshouldnotbementioned*, I have moved on. Thanks for making me stronger. With every cruel intention you helped me find my indipendence. Thanks. =)

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Ouh yeah, my finals are just around the corner. Will sit for my agama paper this Tuesday (Oct 28th). Wish me luck guys. Do pray for my success.

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I am missing my family so much at the moment. How I wish they were here with me. Missing my sisters like hell and missing my little brother so much. Oh, I can't wait to meet them next year! Oh please let the time flies fast. =)

xoxo

-zafirahrosland-

Fall for you

The best thing bout tonight's that we're not fighting

Could it be that we have been this way before

I know you don't think that I am trying

I know you're wearing thin down to the core

But hold your breath

Because tonight will be the night

That I will fall for you over again

Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day

I swear it's true

Because a girl like you is impossible to find

You're impossible to find

This is not what I intended

I always swore to you that I'd never fall apart

You always thought that I was stronger

I may have failed, but I have loved you from the start

Oh, but hold your breath

Because tonight will be the night

That I wil fall for you over again

Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day

I swear it's true

Because a girl like you is impossible to find

It's impossible

So breathe in so deep

Breathe me in, I'm yours to keep

And hold on to your words cause talk is cheap

And remember me tonight when you're asleep

Because tonight will be the night

That I will fall for you over again

Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day

I swear it's true

Because a girl like you is impossible to find

Tonight will be the night

That I will fall for you over again

Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day

I swear it's true

Because a girl like you is impossible to find

You're impossible to find.

xoxo

-zafirahrosland-

i cant believe how fast time flies.

i am now 20.

20?

OMG!

i dun even feel like 20.

hahaha!

i just celebrated my 20th birthday on last tuesday.

bye bye to teen teen sound.

last birthday was my 1st time celebrating it wif my MMU peeps.

thanx to shoba who acted as the so-called 'surprise' party planner.

haha.

it was well-planned but shoba, too bad i knew it earlier.

haha.

nex tym jgn nk plan everyone pki same color baju eh.

=)

i am finally free.

hooooraayyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!

exams are finally over.

bye bye notes+cases!

=)

Happy Birthday to my dearest Hana

 Dearest Hana,
Happy 20th birthday
May Allah bless you always and may all your dreams come true.
Hope that you'll have another year filled with success and happiness.
Thanks for being a fab and great friend.
Thanks for being a good listener and being there for me when I needed someone to talk to.
Thanks for always supporting in whatever I do.
I just can't thank you enough for everything that you had done for me.
Hope you'll have a great day today.
Enjoy your day dear!

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For a shield from the storm, for a friend, for a love to keep me safe and warm...I turn to you. For the strength to be strong, for the will to carry on, for everything you do, for everything thats true, I turn to you.

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Friendship is born at the moment when one person says to another, "What?! You too?! I thought I was the only one!" =)

.

Life is partly what we make it, and partly what is made by the friends we choose.

And I believe that I made the right choice. =)

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Friends aren't jumper cables. You don't throw them in the trunk and pull them out for emergencies.

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Hope you'll have a blast on your birthday!

I am missing you so much here.

How I wish I can be there on your birthday.

Enjoy your special day and hope you had a great one!

xoxo

-zafirahrosland-

Promise

'I promise to be with you forever'

'I promise I won't leave you'

'I promise you will be mine forever'

'I promise I will never forget you'

' I promise etc, etc, etc...'

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Those are examples of promises that we used to hear in our daily lives. To make a promise is easy. But to keep one is not that easy, right? Don't you ever promise anything if you can't keep it. Please, don't give hope to others if you, yourself will destroy that hope. I've learnt that never put high expectation on someone recently. Actually I've learnt that a long time ago. I remember once, my former class teacher, Pn Wan Norasmah told me to never put high expectation on someone. But I don't know why I still want to put a very high expectation on this particular friend. Hoping that whatever this friend say is true and that this friend will change and keep the promise that this friend had made. Sometimes I feel like I am so stupid to believe in this friend.

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Yes my dearest Hana, you are absolutely right. Kawan memang ramai, untuk happy sama2 memang senang nak cari, but kawan yg boleh nangis same2 ngan kita bila kita sedih, susah nak cari. I am so glad that I have a few of them in my life. Thanks for always being there for me. You guys never made any promise to be with me forever or not to forget me but you guys are always there for me. I can't thank you guys enough for that. I really really appreciate every single thing what you guys had done for me.

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I am disappointed, I am sad but I believe that everything happens for a reason. Now I know who my true friends are. I don't need those promises. I don't want any promises. I just need a real true friend who can share everything with me, who will always be there for me, who will never complain and who accept me the way I am.

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I am right now trying my best not to believe in promises and not to make any promise anymore. Please don't make any promises if you know that you can't keep it. Don't give hope to others. It hurts when you don't keep the promise that had been made. I'm saying this to remind myself as well. Like what my sister always said. karma is a bitch, it will finally get u later in life. So, when the time comes, don't blame others.

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To my deares Hana, Happy becoming birthday! Love u loads dear! I'll call u at 12 tonight.

Hehe

xoxo

-zafirahrosland-